Wednesday, November 23, 2005

A True Townie and a Bus Ride

So us townies had finally driven ya'll outta town last night and we're walkin' to Ruloff's (bucknahalf drinks? damn straight i'm walking there) and who do i see but an old semi-acquaintance from high school, yessir it was veritable i-high reunion, only i don't really know this guy's name, i think it's jon, but i always just called him Ghengis Quad. He was the leader of the kids who stayed outside all day in the Quad instead of going to class and hit each other with sticks (did your schools have these guys?). Anywho, he was walkin away from some c-town porch with an office chair in his arms, kinda suspicious, but hey, maybe he's part of a late night moving crew. Well, he gets to the top of Cook street (really steep one running down from College), mounts the office chair and turns back to us.
"You think this is a good idea?" he says,
My companions were speechless, i reassured him.
ZOOOOOM!! CRASH!!
The thing's wheel came off pretty fast, he was probably lucky it crashed when it did, but then again, he probably has a different concept of 'luck' than i. I kept waiting for his friends to come from around the corner and join in watching his descent, but they never did, and that is why he is a true townie, a man who spends his free time stealing office chairs and riding them down steep, icy roads in the middle of the night, completely alone. Here's to you Ghengis Quad.

Part 2 of a very townie thanksgiving:
I see all those kids waiting for buses in front of the Schwartz Center or up on North and i've always wondered what those bus rides away from campus are like. Do any of you guys take those to get home? Are they like those crazy high school crew-team bus rides back home from a regatta? Where kids are all rowdy trying to decide what movie to watch and folks givin' and gettin' tugjobs in the back seat? People just walkin' up and down the aisles, passin' around a two liter of Code Red? Man, i loved those bus rides...

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

LOL!

WEATHER MACHINE LOL!!!

(I'm dying.)

Monday, November 21, 2005

Riddle Me This Caped Crusaders

Have any of ya'll seen the Boondocks cartoon? Spags and Dug and I have made a habit of watching it every Sunday at 11, shit's funny, and thats coming from a dude who didnt particularly care for the newsprint version. Damn well animated too
There, i have done my patriotic duty, recomending a rising star of a cartoon and posting my thoughts
Where are yous guys?
Are we running silent? Are we some kind of crazy sketch comedy U-boat?? One silently running on the dark side of the moon (thereby prohibiting radio contact)???
Can i please see some more posts? i miss hearing your typed voices...

Monday, November 14, 2005

My God, it's full of ... MEAT

So, i get home the other day to find a package. You know that feeling, like when a smack addict's eyes fall on his trusty needle, only this sweet oblivion wasn't meant for me, but Sean "Spags" Spagnoli. It turned out to be from his aunt and musta weighed 30+ lbs. I lug the box inside and Spags opens it up, to find it completely full of frozen meat. There were hamburgers, steaks, chicken breasts, prime cuts of you-name-it. Now Spags, being Spags, immediately starts cursing for want of more freezer space and pretty soon after he burns himself on the dry ice that was shipped along in the box. What followed can only be described as 'Spagnoli over-drive cussing' and if you haven't experienced it you will never come close to understanding.
As things are now, we almost constantly have some slab of flesh sitting on the kitchen counter de-frosting. Spags has really got a blood thirst or something, and keeps telling us that we've entered 'the Age of Meat'. I don't know where this protein rich train is headin', but i'm locked in for the ride now, and have begun drawing up plans for a dramatic shift of funding towards barbecue sauce. Next stop: Gout-ville!

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Game, Set, and Match . . . stick!

So I was flippin through some upper-level channels on the TV cause i have digital cable - just thought I'd throw that out there right away - and one of the HBO's is playing Matchstick Men. And it's just starting. This of course is the movie born of the book by our esteemed founder, Mr. Eric Garcia (where was he at our last show?). So anyway, it turns out this movie is frickin awesome, Nicholas Cage and some other dudes, and this chick are in it. That's not what makes it awesome, i'm just letting you know who's in it, you see. It just warms my heart to know that a guy I've never met, but that I'm now loosely connected to through an obscure student group, can go and write a solid story like that. Makes you think.
So I know that not many of the current skits have seen it, so I implore you, go rent Matchstick Men. Or get you some digital cable. Or the ladies can just come over to my place and watch whatever they want. oooooo yeah.

love, Mike

but then again, lots of times they change the book a lot to make the movie. the book might suck somethin awful. So, I'm not even sure that it does make you think. Someone who's read the book, tell me if I should be thinking!

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

Class Rodentia

Ok, so did you guys do Course Enroll while drunk?

No?

Well I did, and it was great!

Now I've got some great classes lined up for next semester. There's some Desire (I desired that class!), there's some Computing Cultures (I desired computing that class!), there's some basic Communications class I'm signed up for (I desired something!), there's some Creative Writing (write a poem about it!), and don't even think about forgetting the coup d'tat (incorrect context!), Greeks, Romans, and Victorians, a Classics class (double classy!).

Oh, and also I stepped on a chipmunk yesterday when I was walking home from school. I had to though, because it wasn't moving away from my foot.

Monday, November 07, 2005

hey guys wait for me!!!

i made it to the blog... in my heels

Leaf Peeping

If leaves were ninja stars...autumn would be terrifying. The leaves would still turn red, but from blood, not a lack of chlorophyll.

Sunday, November 06, 2005

Sunday...you fiend!

Recipe for perfect way to start your day:

Step 1: Wake up with severe pain in lower back, hips, and groin from sitting on floor for 3 hours the previous night. You might ask, "Why does your body hurt so much from sitting on the ground, you stupid old man?" Well, I guess my answer to that would be, "Be quiet or I'll destroy everything you love." Got anything else to say? Didn't think so.

Step 2: Try to start car, but realize car is broken. This step will take a little preparation (mainly finding a car that is broken). But I think you'll find if you put in the work, this one's really rewarding. There's nothing like getting behind the wheel of your vehicle excited about the freedom and utility it offers...only to find out your engine sounds like an autistic kitten.

Step 3: Cry.

That's all you need to have a great day. Three easy steps. So get out there and enjoy life!

Saturday, November 05, 2005

I stole this from my own livejournal. Don't tell anyone.

I woke u late for y first class at 12:20 I figured this was ok ecause I could get soe uch needed work finished I' not doing work anyore ecuase I realied that y keyoard is roken The "" key the "" key the "" key the "" key and the "" key don't work Neither do the eriod or coa unctuation arks The noral enter key doesn't work so I have to use that fucked u vertical one on the side of the keyoard net to all the nuers

This is unfortunate

I want to kill yself

More news from the front

Well, last night, Tucker Barrett -the filthiest and classiest man i know, hosted one of his weekly super-snazzy dinners, in which he cooks hell of fine eats for his pals, and then everyone gets crazy on firewater. A number of hep cats were in attendence, among them one Peter "sneaky Pete" Sherman of the Whistling Shrimp. Now, as i was enjoying my rum-and-coke and pineapple-upside-down cake, Pete was workin' on his trademark forty like it was his goddamn job. It didn't take long for him to bring up the last Shrimp after party i had made it to, one on Seneca street at the residence of one Mark Blackman. What went down there? Well, as any who saw can tell you, and as even Pete himself will attest to, a relatively sober your's truly took the positively sauced Pete and Ben (Mauk) outside and whooped 'em but good.
So Pete starts to get pretty nuts, and soon enough begins yammering about how 'soft' the Skits are, how the Shrimp routinely out-party us and they will always be there to make us look 'weak'. Now, i dont know how much you the reader knows about gang warfare, but this trash talk of my crew -my very family, was tantamount to a slap in the face. I kindly reminded him of his track record, but he would have nothing of it, apparently that sucka-fool was just crusin' for a brusin'. One thing leads to another and i once again find myself outside in the lawn, circling Pete Sherman while crouched in the monkey stance. As a point of knowledge i'd like to pass on before i escape this mortal coil, Pete Sherman ain't got shit on the monkey stance -try it.
The first round saw me land a few good head shots and bring him to the ground maybe three times for his once on me. The judges (Dug K) agreed the round was mine, but Pete wasn't content and came out of the gate full steam for round 2. Thinking quick, i ducked down just as he was bearing down on me, then back up using his momentum to flip him over my back. Again he charges and again i bring his legs up over my shoulder and try as best i could to plant him in the garden alongside a lovely little shrub. I missed and ended up making him all too friednly with the shrub, and there, with him pinned in the greenery i made my power move: i was close enough to the window to start talkin to the girls inside watchin the fight, i dunno, but i think one of them was his girlfriend. That's right Pete, while i had you eatin turf i was advancing my game.
I was awarded the match on TKO and went back inside to continue by imbibitions. Now, the point of this story is a cautionary one, look out all you Skits, the Shrimp have gotten their hackles up. You go wanderin' into their turf you can expect some trouble, so watch your back. What does next week's Shrimp shrow after party hold in store? Who can say, but i wouldn't be surprised to find those Shrimp in numbers, soldiers with their colors on and their pride needin' some reinforcement. Let's see to it they have a memorable evening.

Friday, November 04, 2005

AWESOME VIDEO GAME

As you all may or may not have noticed, the Skits-o-phrenics have recently taken a slight turn towards the political (a trend which excites me....oh yes....excites me). In that vain, here is an AWESOME VIDEO GAME. I just finished fighting a gigantic mutant Tom Ridge (Former Director of Homeland Security) who weilds a huge roll of duct tape and a bloody machete.

http://www.emogame.com/bushgame.html

Just go with it. It has bipartisan appeal.

Fat He-man forever!

You Tell Me

So brave Sir Williams and i accompanied Spagnoli the Elder to a vet party two nights past. I can't tell you much, but i can say i now have a picture on my camera-phone (it's from the future, when we gave our electronics genitals and let them have sex with eachother) which clearly (poorly) depicts SEAN THOMAS SPAGNOLI drinkig a shot of 99 BANANAS from AN ICE LOUGE. Now, it's easy to say that from that point on, i had a pretty awesome time, but was it a victory? a true victory in the skitsophrenic sense of the word? Well kids, you tell me.
The party had the following:
+ A never-ending flow of booze
+ Live bluegrass band
? Allen and i's beer-pong record 1-1
+ A nice conversation with two girls (who weren't Kim, Jess, Liana or Rachel!!)
? An offer for dude sex
-and finally, during my little chat with the ladies, which had been going well, they called me out on some manner of nonsense i had been spouting and some sort of primal fight or flight response kicks in, i think triggered by having two older females chewing me out. Instead of handling my slip-up like a mature adult i think i said something like 'yeah, you're right, hold on just a sec' and then turned tail and bolted for the door. Not even a goodbye. Why? because i was drunk and challenged.
In hindsight i cannot explain my hastey retreat, but i think the rest of the evening speaks for itself: a week wherein the vet students have 16+ hours of test over four days inevitably leads to a "crazy go nuts" party.
peace in the north east
bil out

My name sucks.

{sung}

I already had a Blogger name
(awimo way awimo way)
but it's so boring it puts me to shame
(awimo way awimo way)
I wish I had a prefix or suffix
(awimo way awimo way)
or a title or nickname or giggledypuffix

{first post since the first girl post...whammy!]

Thursday, November 03, 2005

FIRST GIRL! BOO-YA

blog? more like bloog!

ive never used a blog before. but i see them on the news all the time. i think im a part of history now.

Johnny-Come-Lately

hey guys,
look who's head wasn't in the game...
surprise...

The Second is Mine!

The honor of the second post is mine! Huzzah!

First Post!

Hey everybody!

It's the first post! It's awesome! It's great! It's the first one!

In conclusion, yay!

Amen.